“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please.…” (Galatians 5: 16-17)
So much happens when we journey down the road of holiness. Some things we like others we don’t. The flesh pushes very hard to receive its own will. It is the age old struggle since Eve. The apple was very good to the eyes and she took it. It is pretty much the same for us. Yet we don’t want to hurt God outright. For those of us who are serious about the walk in holiness the evil one has to find a way to stop progress that goes under radar.
How about distorting holy reflection? Pondering is a good thing when it is done in the spirit of joy like Mary pondering these things in her heart. But here’s the catch. Is it a mistrustful doubting of ones capacbility and Gods power? How about an over zealousness to do the right thing? Pretty soon one’s peace of mind can be lost and we find ourselves in a place that is dark, mistrustful, and depressed. It can be so subtle almost unrecognizeable. God is present deep down and the path he directs is true. Are my thoughts true?
Being disconsolate is a sin against God’s goodness. It means either 1. God is trying to get our attention 2. As a consequence to choosing something other than God like sin. The remedy is contrition and thanksgiving. Keep walking and frequent yourself with prayer and the assistance of loved ones to hear what it is you are telling yourself and challenge you to be better.